Mission

“These are the voyages of the traveler Steven. Its five-year mission: to explore the strange world, to seek out life and civilizations, to boldly go where few men have gone before.”

When I set out to see the world, my goal was to check off a bunch of boxes. I set some goals, got a full-time job, added some more goals, learned that taking 50 vacation days a year was not considered acceptable, figured out how to incorporate all of the goals I set, and had at it. My goal was never to explore new cultures, yet that is what these voyages have become. I have started to understand foreign cultures, but I have learned one fundamental truth. Human beings are, for the most part, the same.

Monday, August 11, 2014

Washington/BC - Day 3 - The Journey Home

8/10/14
Vancouver International Airport, British Columbia (YVR)

In spite of everything, this will be a triumphant airport entry.  In spite of the fact that for possibly the first time in our friendship, Stuart made me angry, this will be a triumphant airport entry.  In spite of my pain, exhaustion, and over expenditures, this will be a triumphant airport entry.  The trip was a success.  I set out to do 3 things, and I was able to check all 3 off of my list.  Stuart and I had fun, in spite of everything.  I am very mellow.  It takes very little for me to form a negative opinion of someone or to get internally annoyed at them, but, to get me angry, to get me to lash out beyond a sarcastic retort or sharp word, that takes a lot.  There are really only four ways to do it.  The first is to accuse me of doing something that I did not and to stick to it after my full denial.  The second is to break a deal or lie to me about something that matters.  The third is to go out of your way to initially get me angry or annoyed.  The last is to ask me for help and then refuse it when I offer it.  The last was what Stuart did.

I identified the two things about Stuart that annoy me, and they both have to do with the fact that he never shuts up.  The first is that he is constantly complaining, and his negativity sours the atmosphere, turning my joy into ash.  The second is that he keeps asking inane and annoying questions when I just want to relax in silence.  He claims that he only does it when he’s tired and in order to keep himself awake, but he is always tired on our trips, since he keeps himself up until 3 AM, and I like to get the day started by 7 AM.  I have learned how to deal with it, mostly by just ignoring him until he shuts up, but the poor clerk at the cigar store did not have that option, instead acting as his personal concierge for the hour or so I had my cigar.  I almost wanted to apologize to the guy.  I didn’t care.  Stuart had an FQ of 0.1, while the clerk had an FQ on par with the 7 billion people I previously told to go fuck themselves.

We easily walked back to the stadium, mostly by just following the throngs of people coming FROM the stadium.  We took our pictures and then headed to the garage.  Stuart had parked in a very awkward spot, and, after I repacked my bags, he needed help with me guiding him out of the spot.  I readily obliged, telling him to back up to the right as sharply as possible.  He went to the left.  Okay, an honest mistake.  Then, he tried again, this time just cutting it at 50% when I had told him to go 100%.  Now I was starting to get annoyed.  He got out of the spot but was facing the wrong direction.  I told him to back down the ramp and then turn in the right direction.  He refused to listen to me, insisting I was wrong and going the opposite direction.  This finally got me angry, and I shouted at him, asking him why he wanted my help if he wasn’t going to listen.  I got back in the car and told him that, if he wasn’t going to listen to me, he could do it himself.  I didn’t care if he damaged the car.  It was under his name, his card.  He managed, taking more time than he would have if he had listened to me.

From there, we headed to the airport, stopping for gas along the way.  It was almost two hours before my scheduled departure when he dropped me off at the Delta entrance.  I then saw a sign that Delta check-in was at the international counters, quite a trek away (and back).  Ugh.  I had time.  Oh, I forgot to mention that we split a Tim Horton’s donut, which I couldn’t leave Canada without having, Atkins or no Atkins.  When I checked in, it said that I had a first class upgrade pending.  That would be a real boon.  The gate was a D Gate, which was where the true international flights.  My suspicion was confirmed that I would be doing Customs on Arrival instead of preclearance.  A mild annoyance, since I declare an international trip complete upon clearing Customs, so I would have to formally close the trip back in New York.  Security also had quite a long line, my SkyPriority not meaning anything.  All of this was increasing my irk level.  They told me I could only take one lighter, even with traditional flames, so I sacrificed the one I bought in Kotzebue.  Duty-free was next, so I picked up a bottle of Small Batch Canadian Club.

I was also quite starving at this point, but, if I was first class, they would feed me.  I didn’t want to waste money on food if I was going to get fed, but I couldn’t wait another couple of hours.  There was a Chinese/Japanese place.  In fact, there was a very high concentration of Asians in the concourse, even the duty-free being staffed entirely by Asians.  I suppose that this is Canada’s gateway to Asia.  The selection was quite limited, and the orange chicken was most appealing, but the woman in front of me got the last portion.  I asked if they had any more chicken?  They did not.  Did they have any more anything?  They did not.  Fed up, I headed to my gate.  I checked to see if my upgrade was confirmed.  It was not, which meant no free meal.  I opted for a Quest bar.  I then sat down at the gate and proceeded to write this entry, which I will now close as boarding is starting.

People often ask why I travel alone.  The answer is that most people who might travel with me or could afford to travel with me would not do the trips I want to do.  Stuart is amenable to them, but he pisses the hell out of me.  I have learnt to dealt with him, and I’m really the only one who will travel with him his way.  On a whole, I enjoy taking our annual trip together, even if he pisses me off more often than not.  It is a trade I make, and the trade is mutually beneficial.  That is not about what friendship is.  It is merely a mutually beneficial relationship.  When I do things for him, it is not because I enjoy seeing him happy, but rather because I don’t want to hear him bitch and moan.  That is not friendship.  That is serving my self-interest of quiet and relaxation.  When we laugh and joke around and pull pranks, that is not friendship either.  Alright, I definitely need to close for real now, as my group was just called.


8/11/14
En route, NYC Airporter 602

Once I arrived at the gate, the rest of The Journey Home was uneventful.  Just as I did on the inbound flight, I made the mistake of taking the front exit row instead of the back exit row.  The front exit row does not recline, so I cannot fully enjoy the extra legroom without being able to lean back.  Even still, I fell asleep as soon as we were airborne and slept through until we made our approach.  I might have gotten more sleep on the plane than I got any night this trip.  When we landed, the walk to the Customs checkpoint probably took me longer than the whole process of going through the Global Entry kiosk and walking out the gate.  There was a huge line to clear baggage control, but I was able to breeze right past it with my Global Entry receipt.  The line for the taxi was rather long, and I figured that the wait for the Airporter bus would be shorter.  I was right.  I suppose the total travel time by taxi would have made up for it, but it wasn’t worth the difference in price for those few minutes.

In fact, it might even be more comfortable on the bus.  I am in the back most seat, and the seat in front of me folds down for use as either a leg rest or a desk.  I would not have that luxury in a taxi.  I am very much looking forward to a hearty breakfast, but it’s just not the same when I make the microwaved eggs and bacon as when I get it from Lunch Box.  Sure, it’s about half the price, but, still.  I’ll probably have Chinese for lunch.  Alright, I’m rambling.  Maybe Stuart should start one of these.  That way he can right down every inane thought that comes into his mind rather than subject me to a constant barrage of questions and unformed thoughts.  If he would actually take the time to put together a rational and coherent thought, it wouldn’t be so bad.  Instead, he just says stuff that makes no sense.  I am able to answer almost every question he has, about everything.  If I cannot, I make one up.  He doesn’t care what the answer is.  He just cares that he gets an answer and then forgets it.

I suppose that is a reason why our relationship works so well.  In almost any situation, in a friendship, in a relationship, I need to be the one in charge, unless I am choosing to defer to someone whose judgment I value above my own.  My boss is the perfect example of the latter.  When I bring in a proposal to him, more often than not, he gives it back to me with either no change or just a formatting change.  The other times, he tells me to raise or lower the price.  I usually make the change without question, but sometimes I disagree, and, when I do, he takes my judgment into consideration.  In those cases, he’ll usually tell me to stick with my number or choose a number in between.  It’s about respect and trust.  With Stuart, the trust is there, but the respect is not.  When I say trust, I mean trust in honesty, not trust in ability (see my entry on Trust from the CA-4 trip).  I make the decisions because I trust in myself more than I trust in him, and he knows that I’m better at this kind of stuff.  I also make the more minor decisions.  Just as I give him to him to avoid hearing him bitch and moan, he gives in to me on the things that matter to me.  It is a trade.

He even had me plan the two weeks of his trip that he will do after I left and wanted me on the phone while he booked the hotels.  For the first few nights, I helped him pick one out.  After that, I just put him on speaker and agreed with whatever he wanted.  I wasn’t going to be staying there.  I didn’t care.  The “I don’t care” factor applies a lot to Stuart, and that is why our relationship, while friendly, might not be categorized as true friendship.  At first, it didn’t appear that his GPS would work in Canada, and he has no sense of direction, nor did he want to spend money to use international data.  I had visions of him making the wrong turn and winding up in Whitehorse before he realized that something was wrong.  I told him that, since he couldn’t text, I’d be glad not to receive 17 texts from him that he got lost and wound up at the North Pole.  Anyway, I fucked up my injured foot hiking at North Cascades NP, and I cut up the back of my hand moving the mattress outside in Victoria, but the trip was glowing success, in spite of everything.  After I got on the bus, I proceeded to write this entry, which I will now close as we cross the tunnel into the tiny island I call home.  Next stop: right back to the PNW in two weeks to see my brother in Portland.

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