9/10/16,
“New Wonders, Old Ruins”
Rome, Italy
“I’ve been
waiting 29 years for this,” I said out loud as I looked out my hotel window at
the Roman Forum. I repeated it as I walked
up the steps of Palatine Hill to find the iconic view of the Colosseum. Only Greece and London ever held as much draw
to me. Here I finally was, ready to
enjoy my time in Rome at last. However,
if my reader thought this would be simple as my travel itinerary I posted last
night made it seem, he or she would be wrong.
Very wrong.
Expect the
unexpected, such as being unable to retrieve money from the ATM despite numerous
calls to your bank or being trapped in a, pun intended, colossal thunderstorm as
you begin taking your ceremonial pictures.
That was what faced me when I arrived in Rome this afternoon. However, I have said, “All New7 Wonders of
the World Complete.” I have completed
the 5th of my 17 Travel Goals.
I am sheltered from the rain as I write this entry. I am not in danger of starving, though I am
quite anxious for my first Official meal in Italy. That is all that matters. After 29 years, I am here in Rome.
Before I recount the details of Day 1, I
believe it would be in order to first explain to my readers what exactly the
New7 Wonders of the World are. While not
as famous as the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World, I would argue that they
represent the best list of the seven most iconic cultural sites in the
world. While the WotAW represented, for
the most part, Hellenic culture, they also suffer other major flaws, such as
the fact that it is about 3000 years out of date, that only one is still
standing, and that it was restricted to a small geographic area.
The New7 project was an attempt to remedy
those flaws. They represent the entire
globe and many different eras of history.
All 7 are still extent, and they were chosen, not by historians, but by
vote of the people of the world. They
are all World Heritage Sites (or contained in a WHS), and they are all
world-famous. I have now visited them
all. The 7 sites are, in the order I
visited them, Petra (Jordan), Taj Mahal (India), Great Wall (China), Chichen-Itza
(Mexico), Machu Picchu (Peru), Christ Redeemer (Brazil), and the Colosseum
(Italy). It was no easy feat to visit
all 7, Petra and Machu Picchu presenting special challenges. However, the deed has been done, and the goal
has been met. The rain has stopped, and
I will now recount the details of Day 1 so that I can finish exploring the rest
of the Forum before I get some pizza or something.
After I closed last night, we soon boarded,
and I found myself seated next to an exceptionally attractive Italian woman
around my age. I was soon approached by
her apparent boyfriend who asked if I would switch seats with him since they
didn’t have seats together. Usually, I
would have agreed, but he had a middle seat, and I was not about to give up my
aisle seat. If he had found out a way
that allowed me to retain my aisle seat and him to sit next to his girlfriend,
I would have accommodated them, but he seemed uninterested in working out those
logistics.
I had to
pause to relocate, and I am now sitting in the same spot where I earlier took
my ceremonial picture. I just can’t get
over this. The gladiators fought
here. “Bread and circuses.” That was here. This building is older than Christ, and it is
still standing. There are few more
iconic buildings in the world, and I have certainly been to every structure
that might be considered more iconic.
I had to
pause to relocate once more, this time in front of the rock where I took the
ceremonial picture instead of atop it.
This is mildly annoying, but the view is no less marvelous. I have written these entries at the foot of
the Great Wall, in front of Chichen-Itza, atop Machu Picchu, underneath Christ
Redeemer, and now, here, in view of the Colosseum. I won’t say this one wins, but it’s up
there. Okay, back to the flight.
It would an approximately eight-hour flight,
which meant that, unless I fell asleep immediately, I would risk being tired
when I arrived here. I was not ready for
sleep, though. I watched The Hangover,
one the best R-rated comedies of all time, and I ate my meal, veal with
mushrooms, along with wine and mineral water, very Italian. The girl sitting next to me decided to use my
shoulder as a headrest, which I did not begrudge her, since it was actually
quite comforting, and her shoulder would later become my headrest for the
second half the flight. I felt a little
guilty given that her boyfriend was three rows behind us, but, in my defense,
she started it!
We soon landed, after
having jam-filled croissant rolls for breakfast and we had to take busses from
the plane to the terminal. As always,
Schengen border control was a joke. They
didn’t scan my passport or ask any questions.
They just found the first available place to stamp it. That was when the fun began. I found an ATM, but it gave me an error
message when I tried to use it. That was
odd. I figured that I’d find a proper
bank later to get my cash. I went to
wait on the taxi line, and someone told me to come with him to get the
ticket. That seemed odd. When he quoted me a price double the posted
rate, I walked away. Someone else
similarly tried to scam me.
In
retrospect, I should have taken the train.
In the interest of time, I opted to take a taxi, but that wound up
taking even longer. I asked the driver
if he took cards. He didn’t. I said we would need to stop at an ATM. That was fine. Soon enough, we passed through the ancient
walls of Rome, followed shortly by an ATM.
That did not work either. We
tried another bank, BNP, which is as legit of a bank as you can find in
Italy. That did not work. I called my bank, and, after ten minutes, I
was still on the phone, the meter still running. I got back in the car and told him to keep
going. Eventually, they told me there
was a fraud block, and they would lift it.
I told him we’d need another ATM.
Apparently, he had no idea what ATM meant and took me to my hotel.
I explained to him I still needed the cash,
and he started yelling at me in Italian, probably cursing me out, too. Muttering under his breath, he drove me in
search of another ATM. It still didn’t
work. I called the bank again, who only
said that we got discounted and that they would lift the fraud alert, but that
was a long call. My driver was now
threatening to take me to the police. I
told him to do it. I thought he was
bluffing.
He actually took me to the
police, who laughed at him that he would bring such a petty matter. I had an idea. I told him that he could take me a money
exchange office, which might be on a different system than the ATMs. He didn’t buy it. I told him to just take me to my hotel,
hoping the hotel could charge the ride to the room. As were driving, he passed a fellow taxi who
had a card machine in his cab, so I was able to use a credit card to pay for
the ride, now almost the same as the overpriced ride I was offered at the
beginning, not to mention the extra half-hour I spent on this.
He took me to my hotel and, now paid,
apologized for yelling at me. The bank
now assured me that the fraud block was lifted and that I could get cash out of
the ATM. For good measure, I asked at
the hotel if they could do a cash advance.
They could not. I checked
in. My room was tiny and overpriced,
but, it was actually a bargain, given the location and vista. I couldn’t believe the view of the Forum out
of my room. It was amazing. I had arrived. I said the words that opened this entry and
changed into my Colossus of Rhodes t-shirt, which was the last Wonder of the
Ancient World I visited, fitting for many reasons. I relaxed for a bit before heading out.
First, I found an ATM, which, unfortunately
didn’t work. I was now in a panic. I could use my cards for a lot, but not for
everything. I then went with my Plan B
and found the exchange office, which doubled as a Western Union. Worst case scenario, my parents could wire me
the money, but that would cost a fortune.
I tried the ATM there. No
luck. I explained the situation and
asked if he could just take the money directly from my card as a charge. He could, but it would be a 6% fee. Ouch, but just a minor ouch. I told him to charge what I needed for the
trip, hoping Citibank would refund the 6% fee, given it was their fault. It worked, and he handed me a pile of
beautiful Euro banknotes.
Now it was
time. I headed to the Colosseum. I was starting to hear thunder, see clouds,
and feel droplets of rain. This wasn’t
good. I caught my first view of the
Colosseum, and it was amazing. So
amazing. I realized that the inscription
picture (for the WHS) was taken from atop Palatine Hill. I had my laptop with me, and bags were not
allowed inside the Colosseum. I didn’t
care. I could come back tomorrow. I just wanted to see this view. In a bit of irony, admission to Palatine Hill
was card only, no cash. I paid the
admission fee, and the rain was picking up.
I would not let a little fall of rain ruin this for me.
I got to the spot and hopped up on a rock to
take my ceremonial picture. As I got my
Romeo y Julieta ready, the same cigar I smoked at the Colossus of Rhodes, I
recounted the New7 Wonders. When I got
to “7, Colosseum, Italy,” I lit up my cigar and took my ceremonial
picture. That was when the rain got
bad. Really bad. Thunder and lightning bad. Fortunately, there was a protected structure
with a great view of the Colosseum. I
raced over there, and other people began to take shelter.
I created my collage of the New7 Wonders to
post to social media and then proceeded to write this entry. I ditched the Romeo after the first paragraph
or so. I then lit a Bolivar Brasil
Exclusivo. The rain was letting up, and,
once it stopped, I was told I couldn’t stay at the structure anymore, so I went
to the rock where I took the ceremonial pictures. I was soon told that wasn’t okay, either, so
I sat in front of the rock. That was
okay. I finished my entry, which I will
now close so that I can take a few more ceremonial pictures before I get my
first Official meal in Italy. After 29
years, I’m finally here.
I have eaten
pizza before, hundreds of times. I have
smoked maybe a dozen Toscano cigars before and drank a dozen servings of
Peroni. I have drank espresso before,
hundreds of times. I have eaten gelato
before, dozens of times. I have smoked
my Ardor Duo Punti, hundreds of times.
Until today, I had never done any of that in the country where it was
all invented. I ate pizza, in Rome. I smoked a Toscano with a Peroni, in
Rome. I drank espresso followed by
gelato, in Rome. To top it all, I have
brought my Ardor home, and I am now smoking it in Rome.
To my readers who don’t realize the
significance of the Ardor Duo Punti and smoking it here in Italy, allow me to
explain. This is one of the finest pipes
to ever come out of Italy. I don’t mean
that Ardor is the finest pipe manufacturer in the world (they are, but that’s not
my point). I mean that the piece of
briar and Lucite that is currently resting between my teeth is one of the
finest actual pieces to ever come out of Italy.
I will not say how much it cost me when I bought it close to a decade
ago, but I will say that I have smoked it maybe two hundred times, and I still
have not fully amortized the price of the pipe.
This is a pipe that most big-time pipe collectors would gladly consider
a centerpiece of his collection. It is a
pipe that gets passed around and admired whenever I bring it to a pipe smokers
meeting.
What makes it so special? The Duo Punti is awarded based on its natural
coloring and flawless straight grain.
However, there are a sizeable number of pipes in the world with straight
grain just as good, but those pipes are different from this one in one key
fashion. When a pipe maker gets a piece
of wood with such good grain, he is forced to carve to the grain, and the shape
of the pipe follows the grain. The
result is usually what is called a “freeform”, meaning that he is forced to
make a unique shape out of the pipe to follow the grain. It is a beautiful result, and I have many
such pipes.
By some miracle, this pipe,
though, has an almost standard shape.
Mr. Rovera was able to carve from that piece of straight grain, a pipe
with standard bent shape. It is almost
unheard of to have a pipe with such perfect straight grain and such a standard
shape. It is by far my favorite pipe,
and I have smoked it in so many capitals and famous cities around the world. It is the pipe I now save on each trip for
the most iconic dateline of the trip.
Now, I am smoking this pipe under a Rome, Italy dateline, and it is
glorious. I have brought my Ardor home
after it has travelled all around the world, and I am smoking it after enjoying
some of Italy’s most iconic delicacies.
I will be here for three more nights, and I will have ample chance to
try more delicacies and smoke more Italian pipes, but tonight, I am smoking the
best first.
After I closed, I made my
way to the forum, taking lots of ceremonial pictures both from the vistas above
and down in the forum itself. It was
wonderful being there. Only the sites of
Ancient Greece had anything like it, maybe only Athens. I picked up some souvenirs for myself,
including my replicas, at the bookshop across from the Colosseum. Now I was starving. I just wanted a slice of pizza. Apparently, Rome doesn’t do slices of pizza,
though.
All the restaurants looked the
same, and they all had the gelato station inside. Later, I thought, on the gelato. I got more souvenirs, inexpensive gifts to
distribute to my friends and family back home, along with a few Colosseum
souvenirs for myself. I also picked 4
five-packs of Toscano cigars, shocked how cheap they were. These are decent sized cigars, and the price
was for all 20 cigars was not much more than I’d pay in NYC for a pack of
cigarettes.
I found a nice pizzeria with
outdoor seating. This would be my first
Official meal in Italy. I ordered a
Peroni, my favorite Italian beer, and lit up a Toscano. I opted for the grandma’s pie, which was
cheese, tomato, sausage, mushrooms, and onions, my favorites. I hadn’t brought my chopsticks, as I usually
do for my first meal in a new country (or state or province), thinking it would
be easy to eat the pizza with my hands.
I was wrong.
They brought out a
nice-sized pie, which I knew I would have no trouble finishing, but it was not
sliced. I had no idea how to eat it, so
I just dug in, making a huge mess in the process. It was so good. I didn’t care. I realized the way to do it was to break
apart pieces and then fold the pieces in half to avoid getting toppings
everywhere. I had hit the trifecta. Peroni beer, a Toscano cigar, and fresh
pizza. I was in heaven.
After my meal, I headed back to the hotel
with the rest of my cigar and relaxed a bit as I finished the cigar. I then passed out, planning to head out for
dinner. It was close to 11 PM when I
woke up, tired and with a headache from not having had any caffeine yet
today. I was not even hungry, but I knew
that restaurants would still be open even at this hour. I just wanted espresso and gelato. I also knew that all I had to do was walk a
block to find a dozen places that would accommodate me.
I picked one that had the iconic gelato
case. I had trouble deciding, but then I
saw they had these big gelato dishes, one of which was called “Copa Colosseo”
and came with three different flavors of gelato and cookies. Perfect.
I got a double espresso and the Copa Colosseo. It was all perfect. The espresso tasted amazing and the gelato
even better. The espresso ameliorated my
headache, but it was not gone. I just
wanted to smoke my pipe and go to bed.
When I got back to my hotel, I reflected that it didn’t matter what I
missed tonight. I would be here three
more nights. I will have time to do
everything. I arranged everything so
that I could sit by the window and look out the forum. To do so, I grabbed a Roma special edition
bottle of Nastro Azzurro and moved the chair to the window, where I lit up my
Ardor and proceeded to write this entry, which I will now close. I have written that phrase or very similar
variations in this Travelogue over a dozen times. This is the first time I have written it in
the country where the Ardor was made. I
am not home, but my pipe sure is.
Tomorrow, Tivoli and the Olympic Stadium.
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