Because It's There: The Experience - Day 10 - The Return Journey

11/28/16, “The Return Journey”

En route, NYC Taxi 2A79

Well, after three countries and their national capitals, an Olympic Stadium, a Natural Wonder of the World, and thirteen World Heritage Sites, I am back in the good ole US of A.  I survived, “Because It’s There: The Experience”, as I’ve been calling it.  I am home with access to all the comforts and cuisine I have come to associate with New York.  I have missed it.  As amazing as the trip was, it’s called “home, sweet home” for a reason, and I am certainly glad to be home.  All that remains at this point is to recount the events of the Return Journey.

After I closed on Banana Island, I walked to the boat dock, where I boat was waiting, and took the boat back to the mainland.  I walked to the hotel, instantly regretting it, due to the streets and sidewalks still being wet, and the puddles having absorbed raw building materials, such as cement.  I was glad to be wearing my flip flops, and I knew that my cargo pants would need a thorough washing before being worn again.  I got to my hotel without trouble and retrieved my luggage, bringing everything into the bathroom so that I could change into my travelling suit.

When I was ready, I took the house car to the airport, and the driver tried to scam me.  It seems that this is a thing in this region, and I was constantly met with attempted scams by drivers during my time in Dubai.  I handed him a large banknote for almost twice the quoted amount for the ride, and he said thank you, not even asking if I wanted change.  When I asked for my change, he tried to charge me slightly more than original quoted price, and I told him the price I had been quoted, but now he said he didn’t have the right change.  The difference was minimal, and I was tired of arguing, so I let it go.  I went to check in, and I was told to go one place to get my boarding pass, so I waited on line there.  After it was my turn, the agent there told me that the US check-in was on the other side.  Fortunately, there was no line there.

Emigration controls, however, did have quite a line, and security was immediately thereafter.  I still had plenty of time.  I saw the iconic stuffed bear statue of the airport and made my way to Duty-free, where I got another box of cigars and a present for my father.  From there, I proceeded to the smoking room, which was completely crowded and smoke-filled to the point where I could barely breathe.  Eventually, a seat was free, and I got situated and proceeded to light up my 2015 Christmas Pipe and write the second part of that entry.

After I closed, I headed to the gate, which necessitated another (slow) security screening for US departures, which also assuaged my fears from earlier about them not doing any other type of security controls at DOH for arriving passengers who had connections.  Soon enough it was time to board, and I found myself seated next to two Indian-American (not Native American) girls.  In fact, people of Indian ethnicity seemed to make up a majority of the flight.  That was odd.  Doesn’t Delhi have direct flights to JFK?  Or were they from cities far away from Delhi where DOH was the easiest connection?  I don’t know.

I fell asleep almost immediately, waking up in time for the snack, which was chicken sandwich and a muffin.  It was good, and I was awake now, so I watched a movie, settling on an old favorite: WALL-E.  I still maintain it is the best Pixar movie of all time, and I loved it as much as I did the first dozen times I’ve seen it.  It’s the kind of movie that never gets old.

After the movie, I went back to sleep, waking up in time for breakfast.  The flight was about 14 hours, but it went by quickly enough.  As we were making our descent, I realized that I had not been woken up once by the girls wanting to go to the bathroom, nor had I seen them get up during my bathroom breaks.  I had the aisle seat.  That was odd.  Did they climb over me while I was asleep?  Did they time their bathroom breaks with mine without me seeing them?  Or did they simply hold it in for 14 hours?  This was getting curiouser and curiouser.

Anyway, we soon landed, and it was in Terminal 7, an unfamiliar terminal for me.  There was no line at border control, and I went to Global Entry.  The only wait was for my bag, which took about 15 agonizing minutes.  After I had my bag, I cleared Customs with no questions and then went outside to the taxi line.  There was no line there either.  I got in the taxi, and, once were on the highway, I proceeded to write this entry, which I will now close so that I can publish before I get to the office, along with closing out this trip.  Next stop: Blue Mountain National Park in Jamaica.

Because It's There - The Experience - Day 9 - One Day in Qatar

11/27/16, “One Day in Qatar”

Doha, Qatar (Banana Island)

Before the Gulf States discovered oil, their economy was sustained by a different natural resource: pearls.  The State of Qatar has not forgotten that heritage, and, throughout the country, signs of it are to be found in abundance, as I saw today.  My time here is at an end, and what a day it has been.  All that remains now is the Return Journey.  A boat ride back to the mainland, a brief walk to my hotel to change into my travelling suit, a taxi to the airport, a very long flight back to Kennedy, and then a taxi ride to the office.  It is has been an epic trip so far, and this magical place is where it comes to a close.

I am now on Banana Island, a privately-owned island that is managed as a resort and the home of the #1-rated restaurant in the city.  That is the reason I found myself on the island, and it serves as the apex of my trip.  I have just finished one of the most luxurious experiences of my life, including one of the best meals I’ve ever had, and it has been a great way to end a great trip.  After I finish this entry, I will begin the Return Journey, and I will reflect more on Qatar as a whole from the airport and on the trip as a whole en route.

For now, I will say merely that it has been a wonderful day, and it has whetted my appetite for further exploration of the Gulf States.  I cannot say that my time in Nepal whetted my appetite for further exploration of that Subcontinent.  Usually my entries are designed to fill out the duration of my smoke, but I am not smoking anything for this entry, so I will just get to recording the events of the day.

After I closed last night, I headed up and went to bed almost immediately, though I was delayed somewhat by the awkward configuration of the lighting controls, which made it unnecessarily difficult to charge my phone if I turned the lights off.  I slept as late as I could before heading down for breakfast.  It was a traditional Arabian breakfast, which I always enjoy as much as I do a traditional Continental spread.  The breads and meats and cheeses put to shame anything that Europe can provide, with the notable exception of the hotels in the Black Forest.  The hot foods, though, were sorely disappointing with pork not being available.  I managed to put together a plate though, and I paired the whole meal with coffee.

After breakfast, I went up to my room to get ready and to plan my day.  I decided that I would walk to the Amiri Diwan royal palace, which would serve as the capitol building, since the emirate of Qatar does not have an independent legislature, then go to the souq to get my souvenirs, then come back to the hotel.  My plan then was to change into my travelling suit and leave my stuff at the hotel while I went to the World Heritage Site and came back.  After that, I would have my meals at the hotel and do some stuff on my computer outside until it was time to leave for my flight.  The first half of that plan worked well, but the second half not so much.  I lit up Vegas Robaina Canada exclusive and walked to Amiri Diwan, which provided an excellent photo op, then headed to Souq Waqif to get my souvenirs.

It was a souq no different than all the other souqs (or shuks or bazaars) I had visited around the Middle East.  I got some keychains, quickly finding the touristy part of the souq (as in the part that wasn’t selling live rabbits and spices and clothes), but I couldn’t find a flag pin.  I asked each vendor until I found one who had them.  I bought three.  I even got a little replica of the souq itself.  Satisfied with my souvenir shopping, I went back to the hotel and packed, but it was too hot to wear my suit, so I left that there, too.

I had arranged for a car to take me to Al Zubarah, the highlight of which was an iconic fort that was their equivalent of the Eiffel Tower.  It was slightly over an hour away, and we hit some heavy rain on the way.  I didn’t realize that a desert could get rain that heavy.  I just hoped that it would clear up by the time we got to the fort.  It did.  Or, more accurately, the fort was beyond the range of the storm.  When we got there, I was entirely confused.  There were a lot of people there who looked neither like tourists nor staff, so I had no idea what was going on.  There did not appear to be any kind of souvenir shops or VC, but the fort was outdoors, and it was dry.  I found the spot of the inscription photo with ease, lit up an H. Upmann, and took my ceremonial picture.  Okay, cool, now what?

The people spoke very little English, so that added to the difficulty of finding out was going on.  I was allowed to walk inside the fort, so that took about two minutes, and then I found the Plaque next to the fort.  It was designed to look like an oyster or pearling ship or something like that.  There was also a little museum, but that was underwhelming.  I had not even finished half of my cigar at this point, and the ruins of the town were still being excavated and not yet open to the public.  We made our way back to Doha and got caught in the rainstorm again.

The roads were completely flooded, them not being used to such rain, which caused some brutal traffic and at least one bad accident that we saw on the side of the road.  Eventually we arrived back in Doha, and I asked the driver to leave me at the souq so that I could get my replica of the fort, which I didn’t get before.  It was exactly like Oman.  I lit up a Graycliff and found my souvenir.  It was now time for dinner.

I had chosen the #1-rated restaurant for dinner, and Google Maps said that it was short walk away from the souq.  I got there, and there was some confusion.  I left my cigar outside in the, unbeknownst to me at the time, flooded ashtray and went inside.  It turned out that I needed to take a boat to their private island, which was where the resort was.  Okay, I arranged all of that and retrieved my cigar.

It was quite a process, but I was soon on the boat to the island, which was quite a bit away.  I got to the island and walked to the restaurant, planning on finishing my cigar before dinner, but it was completely waterlogged and left me looking like a chimney sweep.  I ditched the cigar and went outside for dinner.  It was a completely luxurious experience with obsequious service.

For my appetizer I chose an assortment of fried cheese and spinach, which I would follow with a specialty called lamb ouzi rice, basically lamb over rice.  I got some soda water to pair with it, along with lighting up an Hoyo de Monterrey.  They also gave me holy water from Mecca at the start of the meal.  That was something.  The appetizer was really good, but the main course was out of this world.  It was an assortment of heavenly flavors, one of the best dishes I’ve ever eaten.  Add to all of this the perfect weather outside, the nice breeze, and the view of the Doha skyline, it was just an incredible experience.

After dinner, they brought me a hookah, and I tried the grape with mint shisha, which was another incredible experience.  Tea and pistachio-based deserts were soon brought to complement that.  I even had a personal attendant tending to the hot coals for the hookah.  After the hookah, I proceeded to write this entry, which I will now close so that I can begin the Return Journey.  I don’t want to leave this island or this country even or end this trip, but the time has come, and I can tarry no longer.

Hamad International Airport, Qatar (DOH)

I seemed to have overpacked this pipe, much as I did my luggage with souvenirs and cigars I have acquired over the past 9 Days.  I have plenty of time, but I do not have enough to say to write while I smoke this for close to an hour.  Besides, the tight packing makes from an equal tight draw on the pipe.  It is my 2015 Christmas Pipe, which I have only smoked one time outside of the state of New York.  It was about nine months ago, also at an airport (LIM), also at the end of an epic trip (Peru), but it was after learning news that would change my life.  While the news would become irrelevant only two months later, the chain of events that it set in motion continue to affect me even to this day.  Enough about the morose of the last nine months of my life.  Qatar is the wealthiest country in the world, and it shows.

The airport, the roads, the hotels, everything oozes with wealth.  To them, it seems, having the nicest airport or hotels in the world is more a prestige thing than an economic investment.  It is something that I have noticed to be true in this entire region.  They take pride in having the best airport and airline in the region, not because it is profitable, but because they want to be the best of the emirates.  Dubai builds the tallest building in the world, Riyadh has to do one better.  Doha gets ranked the best airport in the world, Dubai has to outdo them.  They want to be considered the go-to tourist and business travel spot in the region.  They want to be the airport where people want to connect, the airline people want to fly.  My experience and my gut confirm this.  The idea that someone would come to one of these countries on business and tourism and not rave to their friends about how wonderful a place it is to visit would a disaster in their opinion.  Yes, I am doing the same.

Doha is a wonderful place to visit.  It had the entire feel of South Florida or an upscale version of the Bahamas or Cayman Islands.  My tourist interests were served well with my 24 hours, but someone looking for a relaxing 10 days could easily find that on Banana Island.  The same could be said for Dubai, and, I’m sure, Bahrain and Kuwait.  This region is a severely underrated tourist destination.  Oh, one minor point of correction.  Manama is the capital of Bahrain.  It does not have an eponymous capital city like I implied last night.

Wow, I can barely focused in this smoke-filled room.  I can’t remember ever being in an airport smoking lounge so smoky.  Even the one in Kathmandu was just dirty, not smoky.  Okay, I really don’t have much more to say about Qatar or the Gulf States, so I will, I suppose, reflect on the trip as a whole.  I think it is fair to say that any trip I take that is 9 Days or more will necessary be a Top Ten contender.  The reason is, I will not use those vacations for a trip that is going to be anything less than epic.  Look at my past three Thanksgiving trips, all of which I used one vacation day or none.  Egypt, India, and Iran.  Even Cuba was only three vacation days, and that was “Cuba Complete.”

What are the extended trips I took over past three years?  The Christmas Trips were World War I: The Experience, Antarctica, and The Orient.  Summer trips included Eurotrip, the 47^th State, Alaska, TLGSRTA, and Rio 2016: The Experience.  Passover trips included my two trips to the Lesser Antilles and the CA-4 trip.  Prior to that, there was the National Parks of the American West, Greece, England/Norway, and Israel.  Rio 2016 remains the GOAT, and NPotAW is untouchable as silver.  Where then does this trip rank among the others?

It clearly outranks all of my weekend trips, even the summer Harry Potter trip, which this trip was meant to remedy of the failings of and did so gloriously during Phase 1.  That’s another thing.  This trip had 3 distinct phases, each with their own flavor.  Phase 1 in England was dramatically different from Phase 2 in Nepal, which was dramatically different from Phase 3 in Qatar.  Most of the other trips were either 1-phase or 2-phase.  Eurotrip had 3 Phases, technically, but that was only meant to maintain my sanity over 18 Days.  Alaska had phases, too, but the entire trip was in the Pacific Northwest, not each phase on a different Subcontinent.  I suppose that England and Norway were separate phases of that trip, as well, but they are very similar places.  TLGSRTA adventure had 2 distinct phases, the National Parks with my mother, then the Canadian Prairie on my own.  That was a great trip.  Okay, so, now for the big questions.

First place is Rio 2016, second is NPotAW, and third is Eurotrip.  That’s when it starts to get interesting.  What comes next?  Alaska and Antarctica are natural contenders, but I think this trip merits a higher ranking than Antarctica.  Everest is on par with Antarctica, so the 3 Phases are what breaks the tie.  I do not think, however, it can beat the epicness of the 18-Day Alaska trip, which I’ll place at fourth.  The shear perfection of this trip, the flawless way with which I executed everything, making up for my failures five months ago are what adds to the value of this trip.  Everything, and I mean everything was done perfectly.  It had to be done perfectly to get all three Completes, and it was.  I had no margin for error, and it all came through.  That is why it easily beats 47^th State, Israel, and all the Passover trips.

That just leaves TLGSRTA, Greece, and England/Norway.  Of those three, I would easily rank England/Norway the highest, as it was my first trip to Europe, and they both remain two of my favorite countries in the world.  How, then, do I compare saying “England Complete” to seeing the Palace of Westminster for the first time?  How do I compare Nepal to Norway?  It is a hard comparison to make, and I’m inclined to say it’s a tie.  Both clearly beat Greece and TLGSRTA adventure, which, while both great trips, are top ten trips, not top five.

For the record, having these two tied at fifth, we would have Antarctica at seventh, Greece at eighth, Israel at ninth, and TLGRSTA at tenth.  World War I: The Experience and CA-4 would earn Honorable Mentions at 11^th and 12^th.  Okay, I have to publish now, so I want to sit on this final determination a bit, whether or not this trip is tied for fifth with my first England trip, or if I want to break the tie.  On that note, I will close and, in accordance with tradition, treat the entirety of the Return Journey after I land in New York.

Because It's There: The Experience - Day 8 - "Nepal Complete"

11/26/16, “Nepal Complete” Tribhuvan International Airport, Nepal (KTM)

My time in Nepal has come to a close, I have said, “Nepal Complete”, and I can now write the triumphant airport entry that will mark the conclusion of Phase 2 of my trip.  On that note, I think I can safely conclude that Nepal is, by far, the most interesting country I have ever visited.  Not necessarily the most beautiful or the most historically significant or even the most enjoyable, but absolutely the most interesting.  From the moment I landed at Kathmandu, the trip was full of surprises and a mix of sites of cultural and natural interest.

When I went to India, I said that I experienced more a culture shock there than I ever had anywhere in the world, and my short trip there was not enough to prepare me for the same culture shock I would receive here.  People have no sense of personal space here either standing or on the road.  Just like in India, driving is erratic and chaotic, yet, somehow, no one manages to hit each other.  I will not even begin to get into how disgusting the bathrooms are.

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The experience of flying domestically around Nepal on Yeti Airlines is not an experience I will soon forget either.  What makes this far more interesting than my time in India, besides it being longer, is that my time in India was spent entirely in Delhi and Agra.  Here, I got to visit rural Nepal, along with visiting two natural World Heritages Sites (The Mountain and The Jungle).  Each one on their own would have been worth a trip, the view of Everest being one I will never forget, nor I am likely to forget my time in The Jungle.  It felt like I was living out scenes from The Jungle Book.

The drive from Chitwan to Lumbini was also of interest, as were the rudimentary buildings we saw under construction.  The fact that half the time was spent with my friend made for all the more interesting experience, this being only the second time he has left the States.  It is rare for me to do end to trips like this that result in saying the country Complete, but I did the same throughout Central America and the Caribbean, multiple times.

All of those countries looked much the same, and Nepal had regions that looked like that, but missing from the North American Tropics were the urban sprawl of Kathmandu, the mountains of the Himalayas, the varied fauna of Chitwan, and the religious shrine of Lumbini.  Yes, they are present in smaller degrees, but not to this extent.  Nowhere in Europe can compete either, as each country, even the continent as a whole, tends to be pretty homogenous.  The only close competition would be my home country of the United States, but I don’t think it’s fair to count that, seeing as it’s my home country.

Perhaps Japan could compete if I visited the entire country, rather than the handful of sites I saw during my visit.  Likewise for China or Mongolia if I visited those entire countries, but I have not, so I am firm in my conclusion.  I reflect more on the trip as a whole when I am ready to depart, and I will save such reckoning for then, but it has been a great trip so far, and I am glad for the exact precision with which I executed Phases 1 and 2 of the trip.  It has been perfect so far, and all that remains is my time in Qatar, which will be considered Phase 3.

After I closed last night, we went down for dinner, which was crowded as groups of pilgrims or tourists had arrived at the hotel.  On my way, I learned that the Wi-Fi was, in fact, down for the whole hotel, and they were working on getting it fixed.  Not wanting to have any more curry, it was difficult to find options at the buffet for dinner, but I settled on rice and noodles, barbecue chicken, and sweet and sour chicken.  I then found some very plainly sautéed pork, which was the best part.

After dinner, Raymond and I went up to the room.  I just wanted Wi-Fi to post my picture and my entry, but it was still down.  We were both also ready to pass out.  I wanted to smoke a cigar, as well.  I went outside and lit up a Nub as I pouted about the Wi-Fi.  Eventually, I gave up and decided it was time for bed, my cigar only half done.  I told Raymond that I was going to sleep outside.  Half asleep, he acknowledged me, but I do not think he understood that I meant that I was going to drag the mattress outside and sleep on the balcony, the same as I did in Boise and Victoria and Maine.  I slept great outside, but I was still upset not be able to post my stuff.

We woke around 6 AM and went down for breakfast, which was sorely disappointing.  After breakfast, I retrieved my cigar from last night, and we began to make our way to the airport, figuring that we could stop in town somewhere to use Wi-Fi.  I lit up my Nub, and we did find a restaurant, where we got coffee and Wi-Fi.  I was able to post my picture there, but not my entry.  I then learned that I had forgotten my room key, so we had to go back to return it.

We went straight to the airport and said goodbye to our driver.  The flight was delayed by an hour, but the airport had very fast Wi-Fi, so I was able to post my entry.  Eventually, it was time, but I lost my small bottle of whiskey to security.  It was a short enough, if uncomfortable flight, but we were at KTM by noon, and we hired a driver for the next three hours, which would take us to Durbar Square and Parliament before dropping Raymond off at his hotel and me at the airport.  The price was less than fare from my apartment to LGA.

We lit up cigars as soon as we were in the taxi, an Hoyo de Monterrey for me, and I was again shocked by the driving conditions.  Durbar Square was a complete disappointment, and I did not want to pay the overpriced entry fee to walk further around.  From there, we went to Parliament, or tried to.  He was completely confused, and I am running short on time, so I will be brief about it, but he took us to what it said on my map was Parliament.

It was large compound of government buildings known as Singha Durbar.  It was restricted, but we could not get to Parliament, nor did anyone know what that word meant.  It was clearly the government buildings, so a picture at the entrance would have to suffice.  That was exactly what we did before I said, “Nepal Complete.”  He seemed to think Parliament was somewhere else, but that turned out instead to be the headquarters of some multi-national organization.

Done with our business, we went to Raymond’s hotel, which took some effort to find, but it was right by the souvenir area.  I used the hotel’s Wi-Fi to post my picture, and we went in search of my final Nepal souvenirs.  I got a mug, keychain, flag pins, and a t-shirt, all with the Nepal flag.  That was Official.  We walked back to his hotel and said our goodbyes before the driver took me back to the airport.  I smoked a Montecristo for the ride.

When I got to the airport, it was a bit of a process to get through check-in, emigration controls, and security, but I was done with two hours before my flight.  I even picked up another small bottle of the whiskey to bring home, along with a bag of chips to hold me over until dinner.  Asking where the smoking lounge was, knowing they had one, and walked in to discover the most disgusting smoking lounge I had ever seen.  Most bathrooms in the States were far cleaner than this.  Even construction sites aren’t this filthy.  I didn’t care.  I just wanted to write my entry and smoke a cigar.  I finished my chips while I waited for a seat.  Once one was free, I sat down, lit up a Romeo y Julieta, and proceeded to write this entry, which I will now close, as it is almost time for boarding.  I’ve had a great time in England and Nepal, and I hope that my time in Qatar only adds to the overall value of this trip.

Doha, Qatar (“Arabian Nights”)

I suppose that Doha is not significantly different from Abu Dhabi, but it is certainly smaller and more relaxed.  I have always loved my Arabian Nights, and there is something special about spending a night in one of the capitals of the emirates.  When I went to Arabia three years ago, I spent nights in the capitals of the UAE and Oman, flying in to Dubai, taking a taxi to Abu Dhabi, hiring a driver to take me from Abu Dhabi to Oman and stop at the World Heritage Sites along the way, then flying to Dubai before spending a day there and flying home.  The reason for that trip was to see the tallest building in the world.

I suppose once Saudi finishes building their tower, I will go there next.  In the meantime, out of convenience, I have found myself in Qatar, giving myself a 24-hour stopover instead of the brief layover I would have had if I had taken the next flight out.  Eventually, I’ll visit Bahrain and Kuwait City and Beirut and Amman.  When things calm down, I’ll also visit Sanaa and Baghdad and Damascus.  No, reader, I did not have to look up any of those capitals.  I knew them all by heart.

When you travel the way I do and have as good of a memory as I do, those things just stick with you.  I have faith in my ability to name every capital in Western Europe and most in Eastern Europe and Asia.  The Caribbean and South America I’d be almost perfect.  Africa I’d probably be 50/50, but Oceania would trip me up.  I cannot fully check a country off my list without visiting the capital, so I necessarily learn the names of the capitals before even considering a trip.  Reader, I consider far, far more trips than I wind up taking.

Okay, I’m rambling.  I am now smoking my 2014 Christmas Pipe, which, like the 2013 one does not have as much experience around the world as the others, but it is the same pipe I smoked in the capital cities of Buenos Aires and Lima and Baton Rouge, so Doha is in good company.  It is also the same pipe I smoked in Giza, which is far more significant than those capital cities.

After I closed at KTM, I headed to the departure gate and found a quiet corner, or so I thought.  Next thing I knew, I heard someone sitting next to me saying that he lived in New Rochelle.  “I’m from Scarsdale,” I interjected.  He said that he used to live in Yonkers, right off of Central Avenue.  We talked about the IHOP there, and we both had gone there with some frequency.  It turned out that, randomly, three groups of people (counting myself as a group) had congregated in the same corner, and we were all from the NYC metropolitan area.

It was soon time to board, and we had to walk across the tarmac to our plane.  We boarded, and, even before we took off, I, appropriately, watched “The Jungle Book”.  After the movie, the meal service had started, and I was starving.  I decided that I would watch “The Hunt for the Wilderpeople” for my second movie with dinner, though this would technically be lunch for me.  As soon as the meal service started, I smelled an overwhelming stench of curry, and I couldn’t wait to be in Arabia and be able to eat just plainly grilled kabobs.

The only meat option for the meal was the same curried chicken I had been eating all trip.  This was Qatar Airways, so why couldn’t they serve Arabian food.  I then realized that the meal I had had from MAN-DOH was actually more British, so perhaps they cater to the tastes of the point of origination for their flights.  The meal was edible, barely, and I paired it with a seltzer and a gin.  After the flight attendant served me, he asked me to put my seat upright so that he could serve the woman behind me.  That seemed fair, and I would put the seat back again after dinner.  I should note at this point that the movie was disappointing, and I turned it off after about 20 minutes.

They soon brought coffee and brandy, which I drank before I was ready to pass out.  The trays were cleared at this point, so I put my seat back again, much to the outrage of the couple behind me.  I told them that I needed it like that to sleep, but the woman said she didn’t want it back.  Well, la di dah.  The seats are made to recline, so I firmly believe it is my absolute right to recline, barring extenuating circumstances (such as meal service or perhaps an infant on lap).  They did not share that view.  Tired of arguing with them, I put my eye mask back on and went to sleep, waking up as we were making our descent into Doha.

Clearing border control was quite a process.  This was also when I considered going to Bahrain.  There was a flight leaving for Bahrain shortly, and, if I was willing to do everything at a lighting pace, I realized that I could fly to Bahrain tonight, spend the night there, see my stuff in Bahrain, fly back to Doha midafternoon, do my stuff in Qatar, sleep for a few hours in a hotel here to credit myself with an overnight, then take my 2:50 AM flight back to JFK.  I almost did it, but, in the end, I opted for the more relaxed pace of just staying in Qatar.

There was a long line for immigration, and I was stuck in front of a complete asshole.  When they made an announcement, he made fun of the guy’s accent.  You don’t make fun of your host country.  Just no.  The irony was, when he started talking to his partner, he did so in a thick accent and a European language I could not identify.  Eventually it was my turn, and I paid the visa fee and proceed to baggage screening, whereby they discovered my small bottle of whiskey.  Someone then appeared and took hold of my passport and asked me to follow him.  I feared for the worst.  No, no need to worry.  He said that they could store my alcohol in the airport for me to pick up before flying home.

I did that and then bought a box of Partagas from duty-free.  The price was a third of what I expected.  Did I somehow pick out miniature cigars?  I bought it anyway and would later discover that they were regular sized coronas but of a lesser quality tobacco or something like that.  It was a short ride to the hotel from the airport, and I went up to the room to get settled in before going outside to have one of the cigars.  They also had free Arabian coffee, which paired nicely with the Partagas, a perfectly good smoke, despite the insanely low price.

After the cigar, I went to dinner at the hotel restaurant, which was empty, but they were still serving.  I opted for the Arabian mixed grill, along with sparkling water.  It was perfect, and I was so glad to be eating something that wasn’t doused in curry, the Arabian spices being for more tolerable to my palette.  This was it, my first Official meal in Qatar.  I was now at 68 countries.  After dinner, I went back to my room to grab my laptop and pipe and then came back down outside, where I lit up my 2014 Christmas Pipe, sat down, and proceeded to write this entry, which I will now close so that I can publish and get to bed.  Tomorrow will be a relaxed day, so I can sleep in and probably should anyway since my flight is not until 2:50 AM, and I need to start getting back on New York time.

Because It's There: The Experience - Day 7 - The Lord Buddha

11/25/16, “The Lord Buddha”

Lumbini, Nepal

While the dateline of Lumbini, Nepal might not be as recognizable as a Bethlehem, Palestine dateline would be, as the birthplace of the Lord Buddha, Lumbini is every bit as significant of a location.  Nepal has four World Heritage Sites.  The first that I visited this trip was Kathmandu with its famous, historic monuments.  The second was The Mountain, inscribed as Sagarmatha National Park.  The third was The Jungle, inscribed as Chitwan National Park.  Lumbini, the birthplace of the Lord Buddha is the fourth and final one.

Tomorrow, I will begin the journey home, stopping in Kathmandu again to visit Parliament, which is the last bit of the puzzle that is required for me to able to say, “Nepal Complete.”  Then, Sunday, I will spend in Qatar before flying home.  It has been an epic trip so far, I am almost out of rupees, and my last full day in Nepal now comes to an end as dusk approaches in Lumbini.

I am now smoking my 2013 Christmas Pipe, which necessarily has less of a storied past than the other pipes I have smoked this trip, but it is the same pipe I smoked in Kas (Turkey), Seoul, and the Drake Passage during my Christmas trips, and, more importantly, it is the pipe I smoked in Machu Picchu the night before descending into the sanctuary.  Lumbini is in good company forever joining the list of places where I have smoked this pipe.

Nepal is one of the most interesting places I have ever visited, if not the most, and I will expand more on that theme during the reflective entries and reckonings that are to come.  While most people would not enjoy the fast pace of my time here, the outline of my trip is easily expandable to spend multiple nights at each site, and it is an itinerary I would highly recommend to anyone who wishes to visit Nepal.  It would be borderline criminal to set foot in Nepal without taking the time to visit each of these four World Heritage Sites this country has to offer, each one of which is completely unique.

The sites I visited in England were almost all the same, most of them inscribed for their role in the Industrial Revolution, the same cannot be said of Nepal, each of the four sites being inscribed for a completely different reason.  The Capital, The Mountain, The Jungle, and the birthplace of The Lord Buddha.  Four completely different sites.  Uh oh, the electricity seems to have just gone out for the entire hotel, if not for the entire village by the look and sound of things.  Okay, it’s come back on.  Hopefully that will fix the Wi-Fi, which has not been working.  It seems to have made no difference.  Okay, back to last night.

After I closed, I headed down for dinner, while Raymond went out for his cultural event.  This was my Thanksgiving feast, and it was much the same as my first meal in Kathmandu.  It consisted of chicken and various vegetables and starches, all drained in the typical curry sauce of the Subcontinent.  It was not much different from a traditional Thanksgiving feast.  They even served apple fritters for dessert, not much different from the apple pie I might have had at home.  I went back to my room to get my laptop and to work on uploading my photos and publishing my entry.  It was quite a process with a slow Wi-Fi connection, but, eventually, I figured out a way to compress the photos I needed enough to quickly upload them and then publish the entry.

Meanwhile, I heard Raymond’s voice from across the resort, followed shortly by a member of the hotel staff who told me that my friend had come back and was now having dinner.  I had lit up a Romeo y Julieta, so I went to join him as I finished publishing, but he was sitting inside, so I sat outside with my cigar as I worked on publishing.  I finished it just as he was finishing dinner, and we were both so exhausted by the past two days that we agreed we would go straight to bed, even though it was only 9 PM.

I fell asleep almost instantly, the lower elevation being a welcome relief, and slept through the night, none of my phones notifications waking me up, instead my phone being overwhelmed with notification indicators when I did finally get up.  The same could not be said of Raymond.  He woke up at 3 AM and was unable to get back to sleep, instead walking around the resort for three hours, coming back around 6 AM, insisting that I wake up for the sunrise.  This was not my first rodeo, so I asked a simple question.  “Where?”  “Outside.”  I asked him if he had figured out which direction was east and if the sunrise would actually be visible from that angle.

He went to find out and came back shortly thereafter to let me know that the trees would block the view.  I wanted to back to sleep, but it was almost 6:30 AM by this point, and we were due at 7 AM for our canoe ride.  We agreed that we should have breakfast first, so we asked to push the ride back until after breakfast.  We got ready and headed down for breakfast.  I lit up a Graycliff, and we started off with some coffee.  I took a pass on the cereal, but I got toast with scrambled eggs and potatoes.  It was quite good.  After breakfast, we went for our canoe ride.

I was still smoking my Graycliff at that point, and it was an epic experience with the two of us, the guide from the hotel, and the driver alone on the river in our canoe.  It was not the type of canoeing that I did in Kentucky, instead it was a leisurely experience that required no effort from our end.  Going down the river, I felt like we were in scene from Rambo, and we both expressed a mutual interest in going to Vietnam, though we agreed that Mongolia ranked higher on our travel list for our next country in Asia.

I lit up a Bolivar Brasil Exclusive to honor the fact that we bought it together in Rio.  I should also add that this was the same cigar I smoked in Saltaire, though I forgot to record it in my MAN entry.  We saw more flora and fauna throughout the ride and then walked back to the hotel after our ride.  We finished packing and then headed out in the car we had arranged to take us to Lumbini.  We stopped in the village to get some more souvenirs and some snacks for the ride.  I also bought a large bottle of Old Durbar whiskey.

Once we got on the road, I lit up an Ardor and started sipping from the bottle.  I did not care that it was before 11 AM or that I was drinking whiskey straight from a fifth or that I was smoking a pipe in the back of a car.  I was on holiday, as they would say here and in any other country that learned English from the Brits instead of the Americans.  I drank and smoked as we continued along the road, enjoying the view, wedging the bottle between my leg and the car door between my infrequent sips of whiskey.

About halfway there, we stopped for a break, which I did not think was necessary and would have much preferred to have kept going to allow more time in Lumbini.  I opened the car door and heard a crash.  Reader, remember where I had been keeping the bottle of whiskey?  Yes, it fell out of the car and crashed to the ground.  It was not expensive, but it was actually the most expensive thing I had bought since arriving in Nepal.  It was easily replaced, too, but I felt foolish for my mistake.  I was smoking a Montecristo Open Eagle at this point.

We headed out back to have some coffee and enjoy the view, but the coffee had a funny taste, so I couldn’t finish mine.  I did, however, get a much smaller bottle of whiskey for the rest of the ride and for tonight, figuring that I would get another bottle at Kathmandu airport, but I then remembered I couldn’t even do that, since I am not allowed to bring alcohol into Qatar, so the bottle would have been lost anyway.  We got back on the road, and I lit up a Carlos Torano.

We were soon in Lumbini, which was certainly the most touristy place we had been all trip.  We settled into the hotel for a bit and then headed down for lunch.  They did not have any Nepali food on the menu, but, being situated between India and China, they did offer Indian and Chinese food.  I opted for Chinese food, sweet and sour chicken to be precise.  Somehow, even that tasted of curry.  It was now 3:30 PM, and we were now short of time, due to having tarried so much en route.

We walked from the hotel to the monument, a temple located on what is considered the birthplace of the Lord Buddha.  Obviously, the exact location is not known, and it is widely debated if he was even born in Lumbini at all.  We walked to the temple, and the crowds of tourists and pilgrims grew larger the closer we got.  We had lit up a pair of H. Upmanns after lunch, and I doubted our ability to smoke once we entered the monument zone.  I was right, and it had the same rules as the Taj Mahal: no shoes, no smoking, even outside.  Fortunately, we were able to recreate the angle of the inscription photo from outside the gate, but it was not the exact right spot.

We tried to sneak in with our cigars, but we hadn’t gotten tickets yet, so we were turned away.  I got us two tickets, and we returned, another crowd having appeared.  When Raymond learned about the no shoes policy, he did not want to go in, and I was told I could not enter with my cigar.  Instead, he waited outside with my flip flops and cigar, and I went in.  My feet are quite dirty as I write this, and it was fair price to pay.  With ease, I found the exact spot of the inscription photo and took a picture there before heading back out.  We walked down a different route to leave, trying to find souvenir shops, but no one knew what we meant.

Eventually, we made our way back to the entrance and found the souvenir shops, us each getting what we wanted.  From there, we walked back to the hotel, and I ditched my cigar as we arrived.  We went back to the room, and Raymond took a nap, while I went out to the balcony, where I sat down, it up my Christmas pipe, and proceeded to write this entry, which I will now close so that we can get dinner and figure out what’s going on with the Wi-Fi so that I can publish.

Because It's There: The Experience - Day 6 - The Jungle

11/24/16 (Thanksgiving), “The Jungle”
Sauraha, Nepal (Chitwan National Park)

Today, like yesterday, consisted of an epic journey to an equally epic destination.  Chitwan National Park is not exactly the kind of place that draws large crowds of tourists, but its remote location only adds to its allure.  Reader, today, I woke up to a view of Mount Everest and ended the day riding an elephant through the jungle.  When the reckoning comes, this trip will be entitled to all sorts of superlatives, and, if the next three days go as well as the trip has gone so far, with all of its ups and downs, I see no reason why it will not rank in the top five of all time.

As I recount the events of today and last night, it should become clear why such a ranking will be merited.  The sun has set, and night has come to the jungle.  The sounds and sights are exactly as I would expect to find deep in a jungle.  While I joked that my time in Kathmandu was off the screen of Doctor Strange, today could most certainly be considered “The Jungle Book: The Experience”.  However, more on that later.

I would first like to focus on that parenthetical word in the dateline.  Today is Thanksgiving, and it marks, I believe, the first time I have not spent Thanksgiving with my family.  I will not be spending Christmas with my family, either, and I think that that also marks a first.  When I was told that I could take the three days before Thanksgiving off as comp time for overtime I had put in at the beginning of the year, combined with us having Thanksgiving Thursday and Friday off, I could not turn that down.

The wheels were turning in my head, and I saw a way to use this 9-day trip to say “England Complete”, “Nepal Complete”, and “Qatar Complete”.  It was not long before I figured out the logistics of it and then got in contact with various operators in Nepal to work out the details.  This is what I do.  It is second nature to me.  I do not need to organize some group tour.  In fact, I would hate that.  All I had to do was figure where I wanted to go and contact specifically with the hoteliers and then work out the transportation between those venues.  The hoteliers even provided much of the transportation as part of package.  That said, as I will describe later, that proved to make today’s journey much more difficult, though it was also a saving grace.

Grace.  As I have said, today is Thanksgiving, but it does not feel that way.  I will not be having any feasts today.  I will not be watching the parade or football.  Here it is just any other day, and that is how it feels.  The one tradition I am still observing, though, is smoking my Christmas Pipe.  I am now smoking my 2012 Christmas Pipe, the same pipe I smoked in Taipei and Quebec on New Year’s Day, the same pipe I smoked also on New Year’s Day aboard the Corinthian when I first bonded with Vanessa, the one person from that trip with whom I still regularly communicate.  While this cannot compare with those nights, it will has been a day to remember.  First, let’s start with the beginning.

After I closed last night, I went down for dinner, my photos still uploading, which prevented me from publishing.  I sat by the fire until dinner was served, and it was much the same as lunch.  Again, everything hot.  First the soup and bread, then chicken cutlets with potatoes and the same vegetables as lunch.  Needing a much higher caloric intake in such conditions, I again was starving, and ate all of it, including seconds on the chicken.  That was followed by flan and coffee.

After dinner, I sat by the fire again and published my entry.  The place had cleared out, so I went back to get my Ardor and smoked that by the fire.  It was not yet 8 PM, but I wanted to go to bed, so I did.  One thing I did not mention yesterday was how brutal the effects of the cold and elevation were.  It was the kind of cold that you couldn’t escape, not even indoors.



The elevation gave me some pretty bad symptoms.  One of the symptoms is an inability to sleep, which hit me hard in Kathmandu before I realized what it was.  Last night, though it was worse.  I should have gotten over ten hours of sleep, but I think I got less than three.  The room was freezing, which made it worse, and I had a splitting headache.  Until I looked up the symptoms this morning, I thought it was just a combination of the headache and the cold that kept me up, and I attributed the headache to a more traditional illness, which I feared might ruin my trip if it got worse, so that, of course, made me even more anxious.

Almost as soon as I got in bed, and I looked outside.  I saw stars.  I walked outside and looked up.  I saw more stars than I had ever seen in my life.  I saw more stars than I thought were possible to see at once.  There were so many stars that I could still see the mountains off in the distance reflecting the starlight.  The picture does not do it justice.  I went back to bed and had trouble sleeping, waking up constantly throughout the night, my headache making it all the more difficult to get back to sleep.

Eventually, it was time to get out of bed.  I went to breakfast at 7 AM, and my chopper to take me back to Lukla was due at 7:30 AM.  My LUA-KTM flight was supposed to be at 8:30 AM, and I would connect on a 10:30 AM flight to BTR, which is where Chitwan is located.  If everything went according to schedule, it would two well-time connections, and an arrival at my hotel in Chitwan before noon.  Reader, to put it delicately, let’s just say that Nepal does not quite have the same Western ideas of punctuality.  I was done with breakfast at 7:15 AM, more toast, eggs, bacon, porridge, and, of course coffee.  None of this helped with my elevation sickness, which felt like the worst hangover I had ever had.  The agent at reception told me to come back at 7:45 AM for my chopper, which I did.

We walked to the helipad, but the chopper was not there, just two empty rudimentary helipads.  Reader, this is where the fun began.  I will be rounding all times to the nearest five minutes for simplicity sake, but, at times, every minute counted.  The chopper did not arrive until 8:05 AM, which meant I would not get to Lukla until 8:15 AM, and I knew it was a bit of a walk from the helipad to the airstrip, and I still needed to check my bag.  I did not see how I could make an 8:30 AM flight.

Once we landed at Lukla, the hotel’s agent stationed there began unloading and loading supplies and gear for the hotel.  I did not have these minutes to spare.  After he was done, he took me back to the lodge and asked me if I wanted coffee.  No, I just wanted to get to the flight, which I now feared I had missed.  He explained to me that there were delays, that the first flight had already left, that the second flight was cancelled, and that I would be on the third flight, which would leave at 9:30 AM.  If I landed at KTM at 10:00 AM, I did not see how I could possibly make the 10:30 AM connection to BTR.  I explained all of this to him, and he started to make some phone calls.

Reader, while for the next half hour I thought that this agent was the villain of the story, he actually turned out to be the hero.  I saw a Tara Air plane landing, and I went to find him.  It was now 8:30 AM, and I needed to be on that flight.  It took off just as we arrived at the airport.  I was angry at him for tarrying and wanted to know what happened.  However, he was otherwise occupied and kept disappearing.  To make it worse, he had my ticket.  I would be getting nowhere without that ticket.  Further, Raymond was waiting for me at KTM, and we had no way of communicating.  I needed to tell him to wait for me at the hotel in Chitwan if I didn’t make the flight.

The ticket agent then appeared at the Tara Air counter, followed closely by the hotel’s agent, who explained my situation.  She repeated what I had said earlier, that I was on the third flight out, which would now not be until 9:45 AM.  My only chance to make the KTM-BTR flight was if that was similarly delayed.  Otherwise, I was looking at a very expensive taxi ride or the afternoon flight, which would ruin the day.  The hotel agent then handed me my ticket and disappeared again, only to reappear with two airport bigwigs.  Some angry words were exchanged, but it seemed nothing could be done.

After talking to two other passengers who were similarly waiting, my suspicions from yesterday were confirmed.  They prioritize the bookings for organized tour groups and then subsequently put the people who book through the airline’s website on later flights.  That was really shitty.  However, it seemed that my hotel did carry some weight at this airport, and the hotel’s agent had actually been attempting to throw all of that weight around to my benefit.

When the second flight arrived at 9:05 AM, the airport bigwig came rushing up, grabbed my bag, tagged it, had a boarding pass written up right away, and whisked me straight to the airplane.  When we got to security, they didn’t even screen me.  They just asked me one question.  “Where are you from?”  “New York.”  That seemed to exempt me from a security screening.  I was on the plane at 9:10 AM.  We took off literally a minute later.

When we landed at KTM at 9:45 AM, I told the flight attendant about my connection, and she arranged for the VIP treatment once more.  They handed me my suitcase straight from the plan, and a private van drove me to the terminal, rather than having to wait for the bus.  Someone then escorted me straight to the ticket counter, again, my luggage was tagged right away and my boarding pass written up immediately.  I was escorted to security again, though I did get a perfunctory screening this time.

At 10 AM, I found Raymond in the departures hall, perfect for our 10:30 AM flight.  The irony of all this?  I’m sure my reader can guess.  Well, after all of this rushing and panicking, the KTM-BTR flight was, of course, delayed by an hour.  On that note, I will pause to grab a cigar, my Christmas Pipe being long done.

Okay, so that brought us until 10 AM, and it is now 7 PM, but this half of the entry will be much briefer.  We had some time to relax before our now-delayed flight, which we utilized by drinking espresso and telling each other what he had done in the day we missed each other in Nepal.  Around 10:30 AM, they called our flight, and we took the bus to our plane.  This would be Raymond’s first domestic flight, or so he told me, though I now realize he had actually flown from Rio to Sao Paolo, but it is certainly the smallest plane he has ever flown.

When we got to the plane, I saw a single piece of luggage out, and it looked exactly like my suitcase.  After a delay, they finally released us to board the plane, and I told Raymond to grab us two seats together at the front, while I sorted out the suitcase.  After much confusion, I realized that it was not my suitcase, so I went to meet Raymond on the tiny plane.

It was so small that, even with a two-seater to ourselves, and my annexing half of the aisle, we were still on top of each other.  Fortunately it would be a short flight.  A very short flight.  We took off at 11:35 AM and landed in BTR at 11:53 AM.  After all of that, we were finally there.  An agent from the hotel was there to greet us and take us to the hotel.



For the next two nights, I did something very clever.  We will be staying here in Chitwan NP tonight, and tomorrow we will be staying in Lumbini, both World Heritage Sites.  In trying to pick hotels for the two sites, I saw that there was hotel group with locations at each site.  I also realized that flying from BTR-KTM-BWA would be a nuisance, to say the least, but it was possible to drive from Chitwan to Lumbini.  If I might be so immodest, I am extremely proud of this clever idea.  I emailed the manager of the hotel chain and asked if he could provide everything for me: a night at the Chitwan property, two activities in Chitwan NP, a car from Chitwan to Lumbini, and a night at the Lumbini property.  He quoted me an extremely fair price for all of that, and I gladly agreed.  I had prepaid everything in advance, and it was all ready when we landed at BTR.

As we drove to the hotel, we passed through the small towns, and Raymond was loving the experience.  To me, it was a mix of various locations I had seen around the world, but it certainly had its own feel.  We arrived at the hotel and went to change into clothes more suitable for the jungle than the mountain before heading down to lunch, which was much the same as dinner last night.

We sat outside, and I smoked a Graycliff with lunch.  It was now almost 2 PM, and we had our afternoon activities at the park scheduled to begin at 3 PM.  We would be going on an elephant ride than seeing the sunset from the inscription spot.  It does not get more epic than that.  We had brought pipes and cigars, not quite knowing the schedule.  The elephant ride began at 3:30 PM, and then we would go to the inscription spot for sunset afterwards, so I suggested to Raymond we smoke our pipes on the elephant and then smoke the H. Upmanns at sunset.

Reader, I shit you not.  This is exactly what we did.  Once we crossed the river on the elephant, the driver said we could smoke, so we lit up our pipes, my new Ardor for me.  I should mention that I did not plan my pockets properly, and I was at serious risk of losing my water bottle or phone or passport (or all three.  I had my passport in my side pocket, which I had to rearrange so that it wouldn’t fall out.  I held the water bottle tightly between my legs, and I very carefully held my phone in my hands.  It was not easy to light the pipe like this, but I did it, and it was epic.  Preempting me, Raymond referred to character from The Jungle Book whose name had escaped me, “We’re riding Mogli.”

We soon found a rhino by the watering hole, which was so Official, as that is part of the reason for this site’s inscription.  After the ride, we had race to the inscription spot to get there by sunset.  We got some beers and lit up our H. Upmanns, only to be told that the inscription spot was regulated, which meant not no alcohol, so we had to have the bar hold the beers for our return.

We found the spot, and we took our ceremonial picture, including the guide from the hotel in the picture.  It was so Official.  Raymond and I relaxed by the beach with our cigars and beers for a bit during twilight.  Then we got our souvenirs before heading back to the hotel.  They said that there was a cultural program in the village, but, not wanting a repeat of Atlanta and also wanting to write my entry before dinner, I took a pass.  Raymond wanted to go, but he passed out as soon as he got back to the hotel.

He woke up in time for the cultural program but would have to skip dinner in exchange.  Meanwhile, I sat down outside, where I lit up my 2012 Christmas pipe (followed by a Nub) and proceeded to write this entry, which I will now close so that I can wait for my photos to finish uploading and then publish after dinner, just like I did last night.