12/25/16,
“Seven Continents” (Goal 6/17 Complete)
Melbourne,
Victoria, Australia
Well, I did
it. By setting foot on the continent of
Oceania this morning and having now visited all seven continents, I have
completed the 6th of my 17 Goals.
Of the seven continents, by far the hardest to visit was Antarctica, and
that was quite an adventure. This was
easy by comparison. 24 hours in the air,
followed by a taxi to the hotel, and then a brief walk to the nearest public
gardens to my hotel. No harrowing voyage
across the Drake Passage, no tenuous journey in a Zodiac to the continental
landmass from the ship, no special gear required. The view I chose for my first Official
picture in the continent, though, was just as breathtaking, and determining where
to take that picture proved to be the biggest challenge.
In the end, I chose Fitzroy Gardens, and, I
hope after reading this entry and seeing the pictures, my readers will agree
with me that I chose well. Where I am
sitting now, in front of Parliament, along with the World Heritage Site at
Carlton Gardens, were the other two places under consideration, both of which I
have visited today in saying “Victoria Complete”, which I have now also
done. I will have plenty of time to
reflect later on what it means to me to have now visited all seven continents,
but it is way too hot out here (97 degrees Fahrenheit), and the wind is making
my pipe smoke quicker, so I will just focus on recounting the events since I
last closed and save the reflections for the hotel tonight.
I am now enjoying a modified version of my
favorite Christmas tradition. Usually, I
wake up Christmas morning in Scarsdale and run down to the fireplace to find my
new Christmas Pipe. I then put on the
Yule Log program on WPIX, have some eggnog, and break in my new pipe, using the
same match from the pipe to light the fire.
This year, it’s a little difference, but it’s more the same than
different. I am in front of the
Parliament of Victoria in Melbourne, instead of front of the fireplace in
Scarsdale, I waited until early afternoon to open my present, instead of first
thing in the morning, and I am drinking from my trusty water bottle, which has
been to all seven continents with me, instead of a glass of eggnog, but
everything else is the same. I seem to
have gotten ahead of myself, though.
After I closed en route (for my Facebook readers, I did not post that entry to Facebook, but a link can be found at the bottom of this page), I woke up for a grilled cheese sandwich and
then went back to sleep until breakfast, which was a traditional English
breakfast (served all around the Commonwealth I’ve learned in my travels). We soon made our descent, and I caught my
first glimpse of the coast of Australia.
It was glorious. After we
disembarked, border control was a bit of a process, since their machines were
having trouble reading American passports.
It was strictly a logistics thing, and they didn’t even ask me a single
question about my stay or imports. I
then withdrew some cash from the ATM and took a taxi to my hotel.
That was when I learned about the three main
spots I wanted to hit today in Melbourne: Fitzroy Gardens (for my first Official
picture on the continent), the Royal Exhibition Building (the WHS), and
Parliament. Tomorrow will be reserved
for the Olympic Stadium. The taxi
dropped me off straight in the hotel’s driveway, and I walked right into the
hotel, so, as far I was concerned, I had not yet set foot on the
continent. I changed into my casual
clothes, wearing my Antarctica shirt, as I had planned for this occasion. I relaxed a bit as I figured out my day. I was very happy to be able to see the
Olympic Stadium from my hotel window.
Soon enough, I was ready. I
loaded my computer bag with my Christmas Pipe, my Ardor pouch, an extra Cuban,
and my laptop. My water bottle would go
in my cargo pocket, and my Montecristo in hand.
I asked my water bottle if he was ready.
It was going to be as big of a day for him as it was for me, too. The water bottle had also been to all of the
other six continents with me. I bought
him in Antarctica, and he came to, in order, South America, North America,
Europe, Africa, and Asia with me before he came to Australia. I suppose there is a bit of irony to the fact
that there has been some tragedy associated with the water bottle each time I
set foot on a new continent.
This is
Mark III of the water bottle. I lost
Mark I to El Al security on my first trip to Asia. My lost cell phone was the price I paid for
setting foot on South America for the first time, but Antarctica caused Mark II
of the water bottle to shatter, which was why I had to buy Mark III at Palmer
Station. My first trip to Africa
resulted in the lid strap needing to be replaced, the damage occurring even
before I Officially claimed the continent.
What would payment would Australia demand?
Well, I forgot to recount it in the 12/23
entry, but there was a very scary moment when I got to the office Friday
morning. I put my computer bag down,
only to realize that the compartment where I keep my water bottle was unzipped,
and the water bottle was not there.
NOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! I had taken a
taxi to the office but had paid in cash and had no way of knowing what taxi it
was. I was in complete panic. It took my less than a minute to find it, in
the (otherwise empty) garbage can.
Apparently, when I had taken the bag off my shoulder, it had slipped out
into the garbage can. I visibly shaking
and could hardly put together a complete sentence. My coworker tried to calm me down, but it was
too no avail. She didn’t understand how
much that water bottle meant to me.
Eventually, there may be a Mark IV of the water bottle, but this one was
bought at Palmer Station with the express goal of bringing it to all seven
continents. If I had lost it the day I
was flying to Oceania, I would have been beyond devastated. It would have ruined the entire trip. How could she have possibly understood that? Okay, back to my story.
It was time to head out, and we were
ready. As soon as I got to Fitzroy
Gardens (about a 5-minute walk from my hotel), I realized that I had chosen the
perfect spot for a representative photo of Oceania. There was a sandy patch, where I took my
first sip of water and made my pronouncement: “7. All seven continents. Goal 6/17 Complete.” I went to take my ceremonial picture, but the
lighting was off, so moved around a bit, finding an even better view, in front
of a stream that had all the natural features I would associate with the
continent. It was perfect. I took my ceremonial picture there and then
made my collage of some of earliest pictures from each of the seven
continents. It was Official. I basked in my triumph for a bit before
heading to Carlton Gardens.
As I walked,
I reminded my water bottle of the first trip we had taken together to each of
the seven continents. I bought him in
Palmer Station (Antarctica), then we went to Buenos Aires (South America). Our first WHS in North America was Carlsbad
Caverns, and we soon went to the Sweden and Finland in the Baltics
(Europe). Later that year, we went to
Victoria Falls (Africa), followed by the Christmas trip to the Orient (Asia). Now, here we were in Oceania. Before long, I was in front of the Royal
Exhibition Building at Carlton Gardens, a precursor to the World’s Fairs. It was a WHS and is Victoria’s most iconic
building.
That was when I had to start
replanning. My phone battery was
starting to get low, and I didn’t have the right adapter. Further, I expected electronic shops to be
closed for Christmas Day (and possibly Boxing Day, too). I could draw a charge off of my laptop, but that
would then kill the laptop battery. I
would not be able to keep both fully charged until tomorrow night without the
adapter. I also was starting to get
hungry, but finding a place that was open on Christmas Day was also a
challenge. Long story short, there was
7-11 by Parliament, and I was able to get an adapter there, along with a
traditional Aussie meat pie. I sat down
on a bench nearby, so that was close enough to count as an Official meal,
though I will formally claim Australia as my 69th country after
dinner. This was only for “Victoria
Complete.”
I had trouble finding a good
spot for ceremonial picture outside of Parliament, but I managed, and that was
that. “Victoria Complete.” I went to the garden beside Parliament, but
nothing was working right. It was 97
degrees, so I couldn’t sit on the benches in the sun, and the grass in the
shade provided no back support.
I
started in the shade, where I opened my Christmas Pipe, which was wonderful,
and filled it up as I listened to Christmas music from my phone, now no longer
worried about the battery, drawing a charge from my laptop, knowing that I
could charge my laptop at the hotel. It
was too uncomfortable to sit without back support. I went to the benches and lit up my Christmas
Pipe, but I was able to tolerate the heat better than my electronics could,
which were at risk of overheating, so it was back to the shade. The view there was perfect for the
establishing shot. I then sat down,
where I proceeded to write this entry, which I will now close so that I can
relax for a bit before heading back to my hotel and taking a much-needed nap
before dinner.
It’s like a
night and day difference. Yes, that was
a joke. I am now back at the same spot
where I wrote this afternoon’s entry, though I am sitting on the bench this
time. The temperature has dropped, but
not much. It is still in the high 80s as
the clock prepares to strike 10. The
fact that whole city is in the shade, though, makes a difference, as my
electronics are no longer in risk of overheating, and the heat is ambient,
rather than radiant from the direct sunlight.
I promised to reflect more on this continental visit.
Of the other six continents that I had
previously visited, they were much as I expected, even if, like Jackson’s famed
Mary, I did not know what it would be like to experience the visit beforehand. For each of the other six continents, though,
what I experienced was what I expected to experience, even if I was lacking in
my knowledge of the qualia that would be associated with the visits.
North America was where I was born, so I
never had any expectations. Europe was
what I expected from photos and film, even if being there for the first time
was for more overwhelming than I could have expected. The fjords and crags, while wonderful to
behold, came as no surprise, nor did any of the cultural sites. The same was true for Asia. The wide plains and grassy mountains were
what I expected, and the cultural sites were, on paper at least, exactly what I
had thought they would be.
South America
was a bit of a surprise, though, since I started my time at the southern tip,
but it was really no different than I expected a polar extreme to be, much the
same as Alaska, and Buenos Aires was literally exactly what I expected. Antarctica, too, looked exactly like the
photos, even if I had no way of anticipating the sense of wonder I would feel
when I saw the continental landmass for the first time, just as Mary had no way
of knowing what she would feel the first time she saw a red tomato. Africa, the same, looked exactly as I
expected, with its abundance of green and tan and its wildlife preserves,
though I had my “Mary moment” when I looked upon Victoria Falls for the first
time.
I cannot say the same for
Australia (or Oceania as I have been inconsistently calling it). I had my vision of the rugged Australian
outback from Survivor and from the Baz Luhrmann eponymous movie and from the
movie Walkabout, but I knew this trip would be spent along the coasts, not the
outback. I had my vision of all the
landmarks and the Barrier Reef and the harbors, but none of it prepared me for
what I saw today. I was simply expecting
to see another city like London or Toronto or even Kingston, but that was not
what I saw. The 97-degree temperature
was easily anticipated from the weather forecast, but what it meant I did not
realize.
I did not realize that
this city would be more like Melbourne, Florida than London, even the
architecture was distinctly Victorian (another joke). I did not expect there to be palm trees
throughout the city. I did not expect
there to be so many parks with lush greenery and streams and fountains and
trees. I simply did not expect that the
city would so well incorporate its tropical climate. I should have, and I could have. This was not a “Mary moment”, like the Great
Barrier Reef or Sydney Opera House will provide, but it was simply a result of
imperfect knowledge.
That stream at
Fitzroy Gardens, where I took my first Official picture and set the tone for
the whole day, was something I could have seen online through photos. That I would be constantly attacked by bugs
was something any travel guide could have told me. This was simply a case of having perfect
knowledge, so my surprise was clearly of learning something new, some physical
fact, not of learning experiential knowledge, but rather of learning things
about the continent that I had not learned in my travel planning. I suppose that was all I wanted to add in the
way of reflection, and I will be on this continent for a full week, so I’m sure
there will be lots more to learn, but for now, I will just recount the events
since I last closed.
After I closed, I
made my way back to my hotel, coming full circle to Fitzroy Gardens, where it
all began. I dallied a bit until
midnight New York time, at which point I took a picture of my new Christmas
Pipe, along with the others that I had brought with me, and a cup of peppermint
tea. I posted to Facebook so that it
would line up with all the other 12/25 pictures I had previously posted. I then took my nap and woke up around 8 PM
local time. I went downstairs, only to
learn that the restaurant was not open for dinner. The receptionist called around, but it seemed
like everything that was opened was fully booked. Eventually I found a pub by Parliament that
specialized in bush food with fusion style.
She confirmed that they were open, so I walked over there.
They had kangaroo on the menu. That was all that mattered, not what spices
or sauces they used to flavor it. Pubs
in the Commonwealth have a unique feature that I’ve never seen anywhere else in
the world, and it is a shared technology that clearly postdates independence,
so I was very confused. You order at the
bar, grab your drink at the bar, and take a placard with a number to bring to
your seat. You also have to prepay, and
they bring you the food to your seat.
Elsewhere, at pubs, you either don’t use the placard, or you just order
from your seat. I ordered a pork belly
appetizer, kangaroo, and a waffle with ice cream for dessert, along with a
local beer.
Much to my dismay, as my
Australian philosophy professor warned me, real Aussies don’t drink Foster’s,
and I have been unable to find it anywhere as of yet. In case my reader does not recall, Foster’s
did a huge ad campaign in the United States with the tagline, “Foster’s,
Australian for beer.” I always dreamed
of one day drinking Foster’s in Australia, but, apparently, it’s merely an
export, not a local specialty. There was
a terrace that allowed smoking, so I went there. My pork belly came before I could light up my
cigar, and it was quite good and paired quite nicely with the beer.
I then lit up a Partagas, and the kangaroo
came shortly after that. It was really
good, though it tasted more like ostrich than anything else. I announced, “69”, signifying that I had now
visited 69 countries. I was very full at
this point, and I still had some cigar left, so I asked for my dessert to
go. Since they don’t do takeout, they
were hard-pressed to pack it up for me, and they didn’t give me a plastic bag
or utensils or napkins, but I could take care of that in my room. One problem, though, the ice cream would melt
before I got back to the room if I wrote my entry.
I finished my cigar as I walked to
Parliament, and claimed my seat on a bench.
What to do now? I wanted to eat
my dessert before the ice cream melted, but how to eat it without utensils or
napkins? My reader will recall that
there was a large fountain next to Parliament.
A solution presented itself. I
could eat the dessert with my hands by placing the ice cream on top of the
waffle and just holding the waffle with my hand. My hands would get terribly messy, but the fountain
would easily wash away that mess.
It was
a perfect solution. The dessert was
delicious, and the fountain cleaned my hands very well. I then used my water bottle to wash away
whatever dirt might have been in the fountain water and returned to the bench,
where I sat back down, lit up my trusty Ardor, which can now Melbourne to the
list of places where it’s been smoked, and proceeded to write this entry, which
I will now close so that I can publish before heading back to my hotel.
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